Hello and welcome back to the A United Front course.
In lesson 25, we addressed the issue of physical intimacy in a gospel-centered marriage. We reminded ourselves that sex within marriage is a physical illustration of a spiritual reality—the complete oneness of Christ and the Church. We understand the grace of physical intimacy in marriage for warding off the temptations of sexual immorality, and we rejoiced in the restorative power of the gospel.
Today, we will focus on the biblical description of pleasure within marital intimacy. This topic is important because the temptation exists to merely go through the motions of sex to fulfill our marital duty. But to have this kind of attitude is to rob ourselves of a gift God intended for us to enjoy.
The same is true for those who go through the motions of Christian faith without having any pleasure in Jesus. Friend, doing this (going through the motions) is religion; doing our religious duty yet without any joy in the relationship. And it is vital to know that Jesus came not to give us a religion but a fulfilling and loving relationship with Himself (John 10:10).
Notice the deep intimacy of Jesus’ prayer for His people in John17: “The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, (23) I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me.” John 17:22-23
This deep intimacy amongst the Trinity and between Christ and His bride is what sex between a husband and wife illustrates for us. To miss this point is to rob ourselves of both a great understanding and a great experience within marriage.
The book of Song of Solomon is a precious book about the lover and His beloved. It is a very sensual book which uses the physical story of the lover and his beloved to illustrate the deeply intimate and passionate relationship between Christ and His Bride. We will briefly consider some passages from this book, so that we might understand more about God’s design for sex within marriage which is not merely to procreate, not only to picture Christ and the church, but also to provide pleasure to both people.
“Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine; your anointing oils are fragrant; your name is oil poured out; therefore virgins love you. Draw me after you; let us run. The king has brought me into his chambers.” Song of Solomon 1: 1-4
Question 1. In Song of Solomon 1:1-4, the bride joyfully sings about her lover. What does the bride want her groom to do?
From the start, we can see that the bride desires physical intimacy with her lover. The bride wants to be kissed and taken into the bedchamber – his love is more intoxicating than wine to her. She reaches out for the pleasure that her lover can bring to her. This is good and right. Even the friends encourage this mindset of pursuing pleasure in love when they say to the couple, “drink your fill of love.” Song of Solomon 5:1